This is the second in my "Virtual Sitting Shiva" series of Blog postings of memories of Violet (Stark) Glickstein, my dear wife of 57 years, who sadly passed away November 27, 2021. [The first posting in this series is Here]
The photo below shows Violet, as a child, with her younger brother Sam, and their mother, Clara Stark. (In the early 1950's, when his photo was taken, none of us knew Violet and I would marry, and Clara would become my Mother-in-Law!)
A CHILD OF IMMIGRANTS
Violet was born and raised in Brooklyn, NY. She was proud of her Hungarian heritage and membership in the Jewish community. Both of her parents were born in Hungary.
In 1938, recognizing the existential threat to the Jewish community posed by the growing Nazi menace, her parents-to-be separately immigrated to the United States. The following year, in September 1939, Hitler invaded Poland.
The image below is of the Hungarian passport issued to Violet's father, Geza Stark, in 1938.
The "Declaration of Intention" document pictured below was filed in New York in 1940. It gives Geza's birthplace as "Pazab", Hungary. [I could not find "Pazab" on a current map of Hungary. "Pazab" may be a typographical error, or an alternate spelling. Google found a town in north-eastern Hungary called "Paszab".]
Geza's date of birth is given as January 9, 1914. His height is 5 feet 4 inches, and he weighs in at 125 pounds. He came to the US on the vessel Washington on April 1, 1938. He pledges to "renounce forever all allegiance and fidelity to any foreign prince, potentate, state or sovereignty".
Geza's occupation is simply listed as "Tailor". That is a bit of an understatement because, in the 1960's, he went on to become a well-known custom tailor with a shop on Broadway in Manhattan, He Americanized his given name, "Geza", to "Gilbert".
His famous customers included a fellow-Hungarian, Edward Teller, the well-known theoretical physicist who is colloquially referred to as "the father of the hydrogen bomb". See Edward Teller - Wikipedia. When Teller came to New York to be measured and fitted for his custom-tailored suits, he enjoyed relaxing and conversing in his native language with a fellow Hungarian Jew.
When Violet grew up and heard about her dad's friendship with the famous physicist, she asked if Gilbert had ever requested and received an autograph. "The only autograph I needed from him," answered Gilbert, "was on his check paying for the suits."
CLARA AND GILBERT MARRY
In 1940, Gilbert met and married a fellow Hungarian Jewish immigrant named Clara Schwartz, who had come to the US with her mother, Julia Schwartz. Although Clara and Gilbert arrived in the same year, 1938, they travelled on separate ships. They did not know each other until they met in New York.
Clara and Gilbert's wedding photo, below, shows them with Clara's mother, Julia, and her second husband, Samuel Schwartz. (Julia's first husband, whose last name was Katz, was killed in Hungary before she and Clara immigrated to the US in 1938.)
Violet was born on April 27, 1942, five months after the Japanese attack on Pearl Harbor. Gilbert joined the US Army. He was sent to England, where he trained for the eventual allied invasion of Europe that started in June of 1944. He did not talk much about his wartime experiences, but we know he rose to the rank of Seargent. The photo below shows Gilbert in uniform with Clara and Violet.
VIOLET'S EDUCATION IN BROOKLYN, NY
Violet's family were observant, Orthodox Jews. At an early age, her grandmother, Julia, taught her to recite the Hebrew prayers. They were serious about attended Saturday services nearly every week. Violet often recounted the fun she had as a young child at synagogue.
My family, also ostensibly Orthodox Jewish, had nearly zero literal religious belief and was almost totally non-observant. We considered Jewish religious services to be a boring waste of time. Sure, if the 13-year-old son of a relative or neighbor was being Bar Mitzvah, and we were invited, we would attend. But mainly as a matter of duty and obligation.
We considered ourselves to be loyal, red-blooded Americans. We had no desire to leave the US and move to the newly established Jewish State of Israel. Yet, we wanted Israel to be strong economically and militarily. We contributed to Jewish charities that helped Israel. We voted for candidates who favored continued American support for Israel.
As you may know, in an Orthodox synagogue, men sit in the front, women in the rear, behind a partition called the "Mechitzah". (As it was explained to me, this seating arrangement is not degrading to the honor and dignity of women. It is necessary to allow men to give their full attention and concentration to their prayers, which is possible only if their eyes are shielded from seeing women's bodies. Apparently, this is not a problem for women looking at men's bodies.)
Observant Jews, like Violet's grandmother, actually enjoy the hours they devote to Saturday religious services. Violet repeatedly told me how much fun she had as a small child attending services most Saturday mornings with her grandmother. Young girls, and boys, would generally sit in the women's section with their mothers and grandmothers. We all know that there is a limit to a small child's "sitzfleisch" (Yiddish word meaning something like "sitting on your butt flesh".) Therefore, according to Violet's happy memories, she and other kids would get out of their seats and run from the woman's section out the back door, around to the front of the synagogue, and back in through the men's section!
When an Orthodox Jewish boy reaches the age of 13, he is eligible to be Bar Mitzvah, the precept or commandment, and associated religious initiation ceremony, confirming he is ready to observe religious precepts and take part in public worship. Even though my family was not particularly religiously observant, I, as a male, was expected to learn to read Hebrew well enough to recite the major prayers and be Bar Mitzvah. Therefore, starting a few years before I turned 13, I attended Hebrew School for a couple hours on Sunday, and for an hour on two weekdays. after elementary school let out.
Obedient to a fault, I did my part. I learned to recite the prayers and chant my Haftorah in Hebrew. (A Haftorah is a reading, from the book of Prophets, which is different every week.) On my appointed Bar Mitzvah Saturday, a couple dozen members of my proud family (mostly from Brooklyn but including at least two relatives from the Bronx) joined over 100 regular Sabbath attendees at the Hebrew Alliance Synagogue in Brighton Beach to witness my performance.
Near the end of the service, in my squeaky, not-yet-fully-mature voice, I gave the expected "Today I am a man" speech to the crowd.
Later that day, my parents hosted a grand reception and dinner party for invited family and friends at a nearby catering hall. There was lots of food, an open bar with (mostly) responsible drinking, and loud music and dancing. Midway through the event, I was asked to get up and repeat my speech. A family friend who had access to a movie camera captured highlights of the event on film and audiotape.
VIOLET'S FACILITY WITH LANGUAGE
Violet has always been better than me at reading Hebrew. She also seems to have a knack for learning words and phrases from other languages that we've encountered on our travels, including Arabic, Greek, French, Spanish, Italian, Russian, and even Chinese.
Like many immigrant families, Violet's parents, Clara and Gilbert, and her grandparents, Julia and Samuel, spoke their native language at home, to the near exclusion of English.
One of Violet's favorite stories is how, when she started attending the neighborhood public elementary school, her mother was called in by her teacher. The teacher suggested that they speak English at home because "it will be good for both of you." I don't know how that type of frank (and in my opinion good) advice would go over in today's political climate, but they accepted and followed it.
VIOLET'S HIGH SCHOOL AND COLLEGE YEARS
Violet graduated from Lafayette High School in June 1959, intending to "major in science and math [at] Brooklyn College."
No surprise! In 1963, Violet graduated from Brooklyn College with a Bachelor's degree in Science. She was a member of the Chemistry Society, Lowell House, and the Yiddish Club.
Love to all, and specially elevated kisses and hugs to Violet, from her husband,
Ira Glickstein
NOTE: This is the second of our "Virtual Sitting Shiva", the traditional Jewish custom of relatives and friends devoting seven days to specially remembering the deceased.
Violet and Ira Glickstein were married in 1964. See our 50th Anniversary memories in the following postings include highlights of our life together.
CLICK THE HYPERTEXT BELOW TO JUMP TO YOUR TOPIC OF CHOICE
- Wedding and Farm Days
- Passing the Genes and Memes
- Computers R Us (Ira and Vi's careers)
- Retirement in The Villages, FL
- Our 50th Anniversary Baltic Cruise (Air Travel and Shipboard activities)
- Our 50th Anniversary Baltic Cruise (Land-Tours)
50th-0 CELEBRATING OUR 50th WEDDING ANNIVERSARY (tvpclub.blogspot.com)
